Spectrummy Mummy

Asperger's, Allergies, and Adventures Abroad

Trying to Be a Superhero (Guest Post by Spectrummy Daddy)

with 6 comments

One of the hardest things we’ve had to deal with as parents has been the separation anxiety of our kids.  Pudding had some terrible times when we would leave, and Cubby’s is much worse.  Mummy can’t even leave to go take a shower without him screaming out for her.  It’s a bit off-putting to be honest, and we always make sure that when we have date-night that the kids are asleep before we leave the house.  There is no need to subject our babysitter to that kind of torment.  (Plus, it keeps people volunteering.)  When Pudding asks for Mummy to put her to bed, I have to deal with the screams and temper tantrums that come from Cubby not getting his mummy.  He will calm down, but not before rattling the windows with his histrionics.  And when I have to put Pudding to bed, I get a lot of the same thing.

The thing is, I know how hard my wife works, and she is always there for the kids when they need her.  When Cubby falls down and hurts himself, she’s the one that picks him back up.  When Pudding needs a glass of milk, Mummy does that too.  That probably has a lot to do with it.  As Pudding says, “Daddy has to go to work.”  However, I have to admit, it’s very terrible sometimes being the one left out.  I always fancied myself as a Superhero, trying to do best for my kids, and that they would appreciate me for it, and want me to be there to comfort and hold them.  Maybe it’s because they’re still small, but I don’t see that happening yet.  It does break my heart when in the middle of the night Pudding cries out and I go only for her to say over and over again: “I want mummy.”  Or when I put Cubby to bed have him cry, “I want mummy-cuddle.”  Instead of Batman, I feel more like Aquaman.  A character that’ll do in a pinch, but not the guy you want to carry the story for long.

I shouldn’t complain.  I still get hugs and kisses from my kids, we play and rough house together, and I know they love me.  It’s just sometimes I wish they’d come to me for help and support instead of bothering their mother, who really needs a break.  I’m sure it’ll happen.  Until then I keep hoping that when Cubby and Pudding have an issue that needs solving, I’ll look to the sky and see the bat-signal waiting for me.  And you better believe I’ll get there as fast as I can.  Hopefully in the Bat-mobile.

Written by Spectrummy Mummy

January 18, 2011 at 7:22 am

6 Responses

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  1. When you rescue me at the end of a frantic day, you’re my superhero. And there are times when Pudding picks you over me, that will happen with Cubby too (hopefully soon!). Mummy does not touch the ceiling, only a superhero could do that. I’m okay with being your sidekick. 🙂

    Spectrummy Mummy

    January 18, 2011 at 7:24 am

  2. {{{HUGS}}} Spectrummy Daddy.

    Some of this has to do with age. Rest assured you ARE a superhero to those kids. It’s the big, larger than life kind. Like S.Mummy said, you’re the one they call when they want to touch the ceiling! 🙂 You’re not meant for mundane things like snuggling. But that’ll change. Used to be, in my house, if you weren’t Mommy, as far as Julia was concerned, there wasn’t much you could do for her. Then she discovered that only Daddy wrestles with the kids. 🙂 Now, it’s “Mommy who?”

    Chin up!


    January 18, 2011 at 7:29 am

  3. I laughed at this (sorry) but last night, my youngest who is 4 (who has only ever had me around as Daddy works away a lot) wrapped his arms around my neck and said ” I love you Mummy and I “like” Daddy..

    I actually felt sorry for my hubby!


    January 18, 2011 at 7:29 am

  4. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Tam, Sunday Stilwell. Sunday Stilwell said: RT @spectrummymummy: #Autism dads are superheroes too! Here is a guest post by Spectrummy DADDY! http://t.co/6m8Rwuo […]

  5. I think you’re a superhero for wanting to help so much and caring so much about your wife. And for your recent overseas service. Thanks for doing that.


    January 19, 2011 at 2:22 am

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