Spectrummy Mummy

Asperger's, Allergies, and Adventures Abroad

Yes Day

with 29 comments

One of Pudding’s favourite story books right now is called “Yes Day.”  The protagonist enjoys one day a year when his parents grant his every request.  No wonder she likes it.  I get it.  I say no a lot.  Too much.  Don’t.  No.  Can’t.  Hardly inspiring and empowering.  Hardly the kind of mother I want to be.

So many things I make the kid do for her own good.  She has to go to school when she’d rather be with me.  She can’t eat her favourite foods because of her allergies.  She can’t wear light summer dresses because it is too cold.  She has to go to her therapies and appointments, week in, week out.  Reasonable nos.

But there are so many nos that aren’t for her, they’re for me.  I don’t have time.  It makes a mess.  We have to be somewhere.  This week has been tough for Pudding.  With Cubby sick and taking all my attention, she has had to find her own entertainment.  When she does, I get mad at the mess she makes.  She needed a Yes Day.

I couldn’t grant every request, but I could make some things happen.  She could have whatever she wanted for breakfast, so I fulfilled all three requests.  She dressed as she pleased, and was allowed subsequent costume changes.  I let her drink juice instead of water.  She could play Sesame Street games on the computer.  She could watch an Ernie DVD.  She wanted a morning bath, and I let her stay in until she wanted out,  45 minutes later.  Then she wanted to do water more water play inside, so we did.

Cubby, now fully recovered took advantage of Mummy’s positive mood, and ripped some books.  I really didn’t feel like saying no to him, but we don’t hurt books or people in this house.  You want to rip?  I’ll give you rip.  I found some construction paper, and we sat on the floor together and ripped.  It was so deliciously naughty that the kids lapped it up, I didn’t mention that it is a good activity for their fine motor skills.  Originally my intention was to make a picture with the torn pieces, but I’ll save that for another day.

We just had fun throwing it in the air like confetti, then pulling it out of each others’ hair.  We made a game of cleaning it up (who can find me a green one?  Three blue ones?) in a ziploc bag.  Then I hid small objects in there and the kids had to find them with their fingers.  Tactile seeking Pudding loved this, though she wasn’t able to discriminate what each object is.  Cubby liked it less, but he got a small exposure to a sensory experience he doesn’t normally like.

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When I put her to bed, can you guess which book she gravitated towards?  I asked her if she’d had a good day.  She answered with the word of the day: yes.

Written by Spectrummy Mummy

March 18, 2011 at 6:40 am

29 Responses

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  1. What an awesome mum you are…Brilliant!


    March 18, 2011 at 6:47 am

  2. It sounds like you had a good YES day too! I needed a reminder that those YES days (still structured and safe) are important too. I’m so glad everyone is feeling better today.

    Nomads By Nature

    March 18, 2011 at 6:47 am

    • I had a GREAT yes day. It is awful to be so negative all the time. it has taught me a real lesson about bringing more yes into every day.

      Spectrummy Mummy

      March 18, 2011 at 11:36 am

  3. What a lovely post, a lovely day. Our kids do hear way too much “no,” I love the idea of a (mostly) YES Day. Thank you for sharing this with us, and I’m so glad Cubby is feeling better!

    Varda (SquashedMom)

    March 18, 2011 at 7:07 am

    • He really is. We got to go out today at long last. We may have seen the last of his baby fat though. 😦

      Spectrummy Mummy

      March 18, 2011 at 11:36 am

  4. What a great post!! Everyone should have a YES Day!! Mommy’s and children alike could benefit -I must say you have INSPIRED me!!


    March 18, 2011 at 7:51 am

  5. So glad they had so much fun, I think I might have to do that with mine! I know she would love the paper ripping and throwing! That sounds like a great book too, will be looking for that one!


    March 18, 2011 at 9:40 am

  6. You should check out her other books, little pea is hilarious, about a pea who has to eat his sweets and he doesn’t want to! Little hoot and little oink are also great about staying up late and keeping things messy. She’s a great author!


    March 18, 2011 at 9:44 am

  7. What a great idea! The pictures are precious, you can tell they had a great “yes” day. I’m going to have to try that at my house. Thanks for the idea. There is definitely too much “no” for my son.


    March 18, 2011 at 11:14 am

  8. I love the pics!


    March 18, 2011 at 12:10 pm

  9. I love the idea of a “yes” day! It looks like you had a delightful day.


    March 18, 2011 at 12:57 pm

  10. Yay for you! What a terrific idea. It would be great to go ahead and make that picture sometime, if only to have some memento of the lovely day.

    I love when I can find some excuse to give one or more of my kids exactly what they want and to take care of things for them. So much of my time is spent pushing and nagging and correcting. I love the occasional chance to pretend I’m the grandma, instead of the mom. 🙂


    March 18, 2011 at 1:18 pm

    • We will, and I have all my paper scraps bagged up and ready to go. Oh, that is why people want their kids to be parents, they finally get to say yes all the time without dealing with the consequences. It all makes sense now!

      Spectrummy Mummy

      March 18, 2011 at 4:04 pm

  11. Oh my goodness I love this.

    All my kids need a yes day. I’m not sure I could have them all have a yes day at the same time…but maybe it’s easier that way? Looks awesome.

    Wait…can moms get a yes day too?


    March 18, 2011 at 2:00 pm

    • Yes they can. I think there is a day in May that might be considered a yes day.

      Spectrummy Daddy

      March 18, 2011 at 3:05 pm

      • Ooh, he has us on that one. I’ve already called it The Boston Tweep Party, but Mama yes Day would have worked too!

        Spectrummy Mummy

        March 18, 2011 at 4:24 pm

  12. What a great post! This is so awesome. I have read that book before and keep thinking I should do a yes day for the kids. But like you, I always seem to have something else going on that makes it difficult. I think I will have to follow your example one of these days. I love it!


    March 18, 2011 at 4:09 pm

    • It was as much good for me as it was for them. There are only so many times you can say no. New campaign: Just Say Yes!

      Spectrummy Mummy

      March 18, 2011 at 4:25 pm

  13. Sorry I missed this before!! The slideshow of photos is amazing and the children gorgeous. Pudding’s lashes are so long!!

    What a fabulous mommy you are! I know how you feel about the “no” and the “don’t”. I feel like I say it all the time as well. What a wonderful and welcome relief it must have been to all of you to share the joy in such simply fun things. You know how to create a mood. Very impressive!


    March 20, 2011 at 12:32 am

  14. You are such a lovely Mom. Love and hugs. xx 🙂


    March 20, 2011 at 9:48 am

  15. What a great idea! I am going to have to try this with my littlest ones!


    March 23, 2011 at 7:02 am

  16. […] give up here.  But I was looking at it all wrong.  Though we can’t manage it all the time, saying yes to what Pudding wants makes all our lives easier.  Instead of giving up, I need to look at it as […]

  17. It sounds like a really lovely day 🙂 We call it a love bomb day and they are the best.


    December 4, 2011 at 10:53 pm

  18. […] up a storm, and we celebrate his birthday.  Pudding went swimming with Miss Arizona.  We had a Yes Day, which is the perfect relief from all those Paper […]

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