Spectrummy Mummy

Asperger's, Allergies, and Adventures Abroad

Posts Tagged ‘SPD

Wordless Wednesday 16 May 12

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We’re over the biggest hurdle- actually getting her on the balance bike!

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Written by Spectrummy Mummy

May 16, 2012 at 1:01 pm

Dummy

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“When you know better, you do better.” – Maya Angelou.

Not me, wise Maya.  Not me.  But I do make new mistakes in different ways.  And I do believe entirely in making mistakes.

When I was that insanely annoying woman who thought she knew best about parenting (before actual motherhood taught me all I needed to learn) I knew I wouldn’t let Pudding have a dummy (pacifier). Then more information came out about how dummies actually helped reduce the risk of S.I.D.S and I quickly changed my stance.  We would have pacifiers, but would give them up before long.

I admit to being a bit of a dummy back then.  I never picked up on how soothing a pacifier was to Pudding.  Oh, I knew that it could help stop the screaming when I couldn’t figure out what caused the screaming, but I didn’t see her intense need for oral-motor stimulation.

I stopped Pudding having her dummy at just after 18 months old.  Pudding gave up the pacifier without any difficulty, and I’m sure I congratulated myself well for it at the time.  I certainly didn’t respect how much more difficult it would make things for a child with intense needs and difficulty communicating.

 She began looking for other things to put in her mouth: crayons, play dough, anything she could find really. Pudding had pica, a disorder causing her to eat non-edible items.  We were lucky that she never did herself any serious harm, though I made more phone calls to poison control than I’d have liked.  That oral-motor sensory-seeking continues to this day, though more often than not she can be persuaded to bite on chewelry.

So the second time around, when I knew better, I did better.  I would avoid the dangers of pica and compulsively mouthing non-food items by allowing Cubby his pacifier as long as he needed it.  And he needed it.  Unlike Pudding, whose sensory system was under-responsive in her early years, Cubby was born sensitive and anxious.

He lived with a pacifier in his mouth.  I struggled to persuade him to use it just for sleeping, and from a very early age, he would hide them around the house.  Pudding took it upon herself as a sisterly duty to ensure that there was a dummy in his mouth at all times.  In fairness, his crying distressed her greatly, so consoling him would be soothing for her too.

Cubby has never experienced the pragmatic language delays that impair Pudding’s verbal communication, but as time has passed, I’ve noticed that it is increasingly difficult for others to understand him.  During OT we’d work on his oral-motor strength with blowing and sucking activities, but his low muscle tone seemed as pronounced as ever.

On to his third birthday party, where he didn’t have the strength to blow out his own birthday candles.  I made an appointment for a Speech and Language Assessment.  Now, only part of his articulation difficulties are directly caused by the pacifier, but using the dummy has certainly contributed.  With tongue thrust, swallowing difficulties and weakness of the orofacial muscles, it became clear that intensive efforts would be needed to help with his articulation.  The dummy had to go- immediately, and speech therapy sessions twice a week are the order of the day.

Cubby didn’t give it up quite so easily as his big sister, but he hasn’t made mention of his dummy in a few days.  I’m confident throwing them all out once and for all.  It is interesting sitting through another set of speech therapy sessions with another child, and working on completely different problems.

I’ve chastised myself for my leniency with the pacifier this time, just as I berated myself for the strictness that contributed to Pudding’s pica and sensory seeking.  But really, even the wisdom of Ms. Angelou wouldn’t help here.

When it comes to raising kids with different needs, when you know different, you do different.  Whether the outcome is the same or completely different, trying doesn’t make you a dummy, which is good, because we don’t need any more of those in our house.

Written by Spectrummy Mummy

April 23, 2012 at 2:07 pm

N is for Nearlytypical

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N is also for neurotypical, normal, and non-autistic.

I’m the mother of two children.  They are both verbal, affectionate, sensitive, intelligent, funny, devious, and have occasional problems interacting with others.  My daughter is diagnosed with an ASD (and ADHD), and my son isn’t.

When he was a baby, and Pudding had recently been diagnosed with Asperger’s, I enrolled Cubby in a sibling study.  From the first session (at 10 months old) they found some small concerns about his development, but he never met the criteria for autism.  He was found, at various times, to have difficulties with joint attention, anxiety, fine and gross motor delays, sensory issues, and low muscle tone.

In the last few weeks, we’ve seen some additional behavioral problems thrown into the mix.  He is becoming more aggressive, both at school and at home.  He isn’t responding well to discipline, and is explosively emotional.  In many ways, he is more challenging than his sister was at this age, and 3 was a tough year for her too.

Interestingly, some of the techniques we used on Pudding, work well on Cubby, and others he rebels against entirely.  He loves a social story, and enjoys routine, as well as being “talked through” what is going to happen.  We’ve had no success whatsoever in trying to modify his behaviour through positive reinforcement.

Whenever I see a study comparing a group of autistic individuals against a control group of neurotypicals, I question if it is as simple as that.  Of course, autism is a spectrum, a diagnostic grouping of symptoms that describe a vast range of individuals.  I only have to collect Pudding from her preschool to witness how vast that range can be, and how severe some of those challenges can present.

But the similarities between these siblings seem to be more evident than their differences.  Cubby is a far more effective at communicating than his sister, both verbally and non-verbally, but she is more socially-motivated than he is.  While he isn’t autistic, it isn’t as simple as describing him as non-autistic, or neurotypical, or even (God forbid) normal.

I’m going to stick with nearlytypical for now.

All this was going over my mind as I couldn’t get to sleep last night.  The sheets were too scratchy, it was too hot for the heavy quilt, but there wasn’t enough weight with just a sheet and light blanket. It was too loud outside, and too light inside.  Maybe one day there’ll be a sensory spectrum.  Until then I might call myself nearlytypical too….though Spectrummy Mummy fits me just fine.

This post is a continuation of my A-Z series.  You can read the rest by clicking >here<.

Written by Spectrummy Mummy

April 12, 2012 at 2:32 pm

Wordless Wednesday 04 Apr 12

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Blowing out candles is harder than you think with low muscle tone.

Good job he only had three this year!

Written by Spectrummy Mummy

April 4, 2012 at 12:20 pm

Wordless Wednesday 22 Feb 12

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Well, my camera is still broken, so I delved into the archives to find one from this time last year.  I managed to catch a moment of sweetness seconds before Cubby started screaming at the proximity of his sister.

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February 22, 2012 at 3:31 pm

Wordless Wednesday 11 Jan 12

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The only cure for back-to-school anxiety...a Daddy cuddle.

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January 11, 2012 at 11:32 am

Wordless Wednesday 28 Dec 11

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They share a mutual love of fountains.

Happy Wordless Wednesday everyone!

Written by Spectrummy Mummy

December 28, 2011 at 1:51 pm